Frustration

This post could go on either of my blogs; but as it describes my day of busyness, I elected to place it here. And the truth of the matter is that I have not mused over the truths I still need to learn from a day like today.

"One of those days"

A term we often hear, often use. I could say I had one today, but just saying it frustrates me. I do not want to have one of those days. Not that I get a choice necessarily, but when I choose to control things that I am able to without being a nazi and not suffering a terrible mishap and I still feel like I had one of those days it is frustrating. It is frustrating being frustrated.

I woke up early today. That is impressive. If you are not impressed, please be, because it is impressive. We tend to be owls around here - it just fits our homeschooling and ministry minded lifestyle, therefore we rarely go to bed before midnight. The big problem with said bedtime is that nothing is accomplished of great magnitude between 8-midnight, whereas early birds aren't known to sit around for four hours when they wake up, so therefore we/I have become time wasters of sorts. And not me so much, I just know that my time can be used more efficiently in the morning than late at night.

I need to lose weight. Dont try to deny the fact or tell me I'm ok the way I am, because I need to lose weight. a) I dont fit in a lot of my clothing and b) it would help my arthritic tendencies and pain that I experience on a daily basis. So last night I decided to try to get up early and do the elliptical in the morning before the kids wake up and see if I could make that a routine of sorts because I honestly cannot imagine any other time that would work.

Frustration number 1: 2 kids were up already when I got up early, and since I walk through their room to get up, I was nice and helped them get up and gave them breakfast. I still needed to exercise so I gave them coloring at the table to keep them happy. Enter frustration number 2: after 30 seconds I hear "MOMMY" repeatedly over and over. (child number 4 had finished coloring and wanted to get down) I do understand that women exist everywhere that will never hear that and want to desperately, but I was still frustrated.

I got the boys up early as well to start homeschooling at a decent hour. I was distracted by several phone calls which were necessary but still a deterrant to follow the schedule set the previous evening. Enter frustration 4 5 6 7 and 8? Frustration 9:boys did nothing productive while I was on the phone. Granted, I do not EXPECT a 6 year old to decide to clean up his completely cluttered bedroom without being nagged to death, but it would just be nice. And 8 year old boy was reading, which is good, but he still could have started some school work.

Therefore, school which was planned to start no later than 9/9:30 started at 11:30. Frustration 10 or 11?: we finally start school and every child claims starvation.

This one was good: I am wrapping up some school work in order to make lunch and hear 2 small children having WAY too much fun in the bathroom. I go up to the bathroom and behold, the bathroom which was just cleaned last night while said children were bathing is now covered in pine-sol, pee, and toilet water. That might make a lovely cleaning concoction of sorts, but have I mentioned that it was already clean? The toilet brush in the overflowing kid-potty was a nice touch. Kinda made it look like the cleaning lady had just arrived. or disappeared. #12.

Austin couldnt find his cd Grandma gave him for Christmas although we can cancel this frustration b/c it was in the car where he thought it was.

a dim light in the day: (well actually a little candle) ice-skating lessons were a bit cheaper than planned.

#13 no cocoa powder. needed it to make brownies from scratch for our math lesson today. Instead we made coffee cake which is just as good if not better.

another light: was able to clean up the house and load the dishwasher while on the phone. If i had just cleaned we would have started late anyway, but at least I was able to do both.

#14 can't finish a sodoku to save my life and it makes me crazy, but almost not anymore b/c I'm getting used to it.

#15 keep forgetting about the clothes in the dryer that I keep fluffing up so they are not wrinkled.

#16 bought Gray's next spelling book on ebay which arrived today, only to realize the sellers advertised the wrong book. I don't think my 3rd grader would be too thrilled to memorize the spelling of embargoes, machinest, or spaghetti. had to spend a bit of time online trying to figure out next course of action.

#17 which should have been #1 - woke up to find the toilet running all night. And i think out of all the frustrations this really is number 1, b/c the toilet is driving me crazy. It either runs incessantly or doesnt flush b/c it has no water at all. How can 2 relatively intelligent people not figure out how to make a toilet run properly? (and our water bill was sky-high last month b/c of stupid said toilet.)

#18 friend cancelled plans that were important to me and the boys that was to occur later in the week.

I am tired. It is now lots of minutes past 11 and I am going to bed. I am exhausted and believe it or not, I think I am feeling a bit sore from my little jaunt on the elliptical. I am also going to try to wake early again tomorrow. My lovely sister has gone out on a complete limb/of her mind and offered to take all 4 kiddos which is just wonderful. They are going to make gingerbread houses and allow me to get some stuff done. Enter another frustration b/c I believe 2 youngest are running low-grade fevers, but we will make a decision about which children should participate in the a.m. Was going to continue to work in playroom b/c it desperately needs me and is howling for attention, but we shall see what the new day shall bring.

And just as a disclaimer, I am not complaining. I did not fall apart or lose my mind or throw away my day. We actually got a lot done and did a lot of learning and started ice-skating lessons this evening. I guess this is just a bridge to something I need to think about and dwell on more, b/c I got through it all with patience and some kindness, and was able to re-focus repeatedly. I am really not ok with accepting this as the norm, and that is the problem, b/c what if it becomes the norm? None of these were BIG DEALS by themselves. It was just one of those days when 18 little frustrations were adding up. Kind of like a dripping faucet, only it was dripping frustrations. And I actually have a lot on my mind about much bigger things that cannot be changed or altered until our days are more regimented and more successful.

Look for another post on musing sometime soon, and maybe the thoughts behind all this will make more sense. For now, just sharing my day. And yes, I am thankful beyond measure to have had a day with four adorable children and a loving husband.